I always thought by 30 I’d be real together

right as rain

career path

long and laid out before me

like an offering on a banquet table

steak knife and fork in hand

ready to bite.

I always thought by 30 I’d be sewn up and whole

complete with parts united

decided

on the run

off the cuff, out of line

cool cat glasses

pure magnetic charisma

a dynamo in bed.

I always thought by 30 I’d love the smell of coffee

gym sweat, fresh car scent

romantic interludes

enough but not too many

bank account ready,

well read, obscure cultural capital

30% tips on the reg

generous with friends

and the homeless.

 

Well “fuck”

is all I have to say

about that.